Born to a large rock in Russia i was raised by an Amish family until i reached my teen years. Then when i heard the music of Rick Asley and Wham I decided that the country life was not for me, so i packed up things and headed to the big city with my pet hamster i called Hans christian anderson.

unfortunately city life proved to be a big change for a country boy like myself and i was eventually became homeless in a matter of weeks. our struggle for food and clothes turned me to pimp my beloved Hans out to middle aged gay couples. things were finally on the up as me and Hans saved our earnings and managed to buy a nice condo on the Dominican coast. we spent the next 2 years in relative bliss only needing to go on the job every other week. life was good, that is until and unfortunate mining accident occured with Hans in one of his regular customers. Hans was left brain dead and the hospital eventually turned off the machine. on the brighter side Hans left me everything in his will! end:)

Oh and I also do iPhone and web development!